ITV Cymru Wales newsreader Andrea Byrne gives us yet another enthralling update on her baby’s progress as she describes their visit to the Cardiff studios, while our satirical writer Edwin Phillips reads a glossy magazine pushed through the doors of homes in the city, following the ‘information’ in her column in it about her pregnancy, attending the Tennis Wales award ceremony and her recent trip to Wimbledon.
Journalism is just child’s play.
That’s a little joke for you all because my nine month old baby Jemima and I paid a visit to see my friends in the ITV Cymru Wales newsroom.
They are all journalists there like what I am.
It might cheer up your dull humdrum lives.
My column in Cardiff Life of course, as you all know, is called ‘MUM’S THE WORD’ which is so clever and accurate!
It is something called ‘a play on words’.
Everybody will have been interested before by the updates about Jemima that I have written in my column called ‘MUM’S THE WORD’ in Cardiff Life, such as: “First we started weaning her; then she started rolling; and now our baby has teeth”.
I told you all about the health spa I went to known as The Vale Resort Hotel and Spa, because I realise you probably haven’t been to one of those.
It will have been absolutely riveting to read in my column called ‘MUM’S THE WORD’ in Cardiff Life: “My treatment was… divine. Seventy blissful minutes… I was in heaven”.
I gave you further crucial details, like: “I can safely say the products used here are some of the kindest on the market when it comes to looking after the health of your nails.”
And: “I was determined to find time to carry on (with yoga) when I became a mum.”
I know from the flood of a letter that my fans enjoy these updates.
The letter was clearly supportive when the writer said: “WHY DO YOU WRITE SUCH MINDLESS DRIVEL?!”.
So I wanted to give you all further descriptions which my fan calls ‘completely vacuous’ whatever that means!
As I wrote in my column called ‘MUM’S THE WORD’ in Cardiff Life my baby and I “paid another visit to the ITV Cymru Wales Cardiff studio to see all my news colleagues, which was very exciting”.
You will all have been fascinated to learn that “Jemima settled straight into telly life, beaming for the camera”.
In the past you will have been engrossed in the fact I have even given you news about my family life with my hubby the former international star rugby player Lee (Byrne).
You will have been captivated to read in my column called ‘MUM’S THE WORD’ in Cardiff Life: “Thanks to dad Lee again, I was so grateful to take 48 hours out to immerse myself in yoga again, in a beautiful coastal setting…”.
The name of my hubby, the former international star rugby player Lee (Byrne), is so important to me.
In my column called ‘MUM’S THE WORD’ in Cardiff Life you all heard about the “baby Byrne calendar” and that “thanks to nanny Byrne we enjoyed a fab evening…”.
I think there is a place for a woman and a place for a man.
I’m so glad I have taken my hubby the former international star rugby player Lee’s name and I am now ANDREA BYRNE – I simply don’t understand all this independent woman nonsense – and showed a picture of him holding our baby beside the pool on holiday.
These are such important reports, which is why my colleagues decided they should go on the ITV Cymru Wales News website.
Vital information was published and I repeated it in my hilarious and informative column called ‘MUM’S THE WORD’ in Cardiff Life: “When she wasn’t sleeping or swimming, Jemima easily attracted quite a holiday fan club. She rocked her pink baby sunglasses wherever she went and there’s little doubt she was the coolest – and I think the cutest – baby in the resort! Though, of course, I may be a just a little bit biased!”.
This is almost as important as my Tweets, like when I bade you all last month a ‘happy Halloween’, with Jemima looking cute as usual.
So stay happy, and the fan who told me this was ‘airhead stuff’ will be enthralled by more informative Tweets from me such as this one.
I will include this extremely important information in my column called ‘MUM’S THE WORD’ in Cardiff Life.
Tomorrow – the internal documents that reveal the thousands of pounds spent in legal fees during a controversial South Wales land deal under investigation by the police in an alleged bribery probe.
Phil Parry’s memories of his extraordinary 36-year award-winning career in journalism as he was gripped by the incurable disabling condition Hereditary Spastic Paraplegia (HSP), have been released in a major new book ‘A GOOD STORY’. Order the book now!