Latest posts by NotSoGreatDictator (see all)
- Swansea Roadworks Museum Opens - 23rd July 2019
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- Mark Drakeford Injects Crystal Meth and Vodka into Own Eyeball During First Minister’s Questions - 18th June 2019
Swansea’s Prince Of Wales UNESCO world heritage roadworks are proving a huge success with tourists, we can reveal. This week the MS Amadea which has 620 German passengers on board docked in the city specifically to see the unique cultural phenomenon.
Although it is only on a short two-week cruise around the British Isles, the ship has made the Prince of Wales roadworks a premiere destination. Nowhere else on the planet is it possible to witness roadworks with such a long heritage and diverse set of origin stories.
Some say it was the Knights Hospitaller who started them, others traced their origin to the 12th Duke of Beaufort, yet others suggest they could be at least 5,000 years old. Whatever the truth, their strange beauty has caught the eye of the world and Swansea can hold its head up again.
Swansea council’s scheme to turn them into a living museum has drawn criticism locally but financially it has been only a massive to crippling burden with almost two tourist boats to date having docked.
A shuttle bus whisked the tourists into the centre of Swansea for ironic shopping opportunities where they were able to see and even touch the roadworks. Soon they were queuing up to take selfies with the hilarious “Businesses Open As Usual” sign and many of them stood in front of the recently opened “Roadworks Through The Ages” section with wide-eyed amazement.
This section enables visitors to see the stratification of the roadworks as they have been revealed by a team of modern apprentices doing some archaeology. Each inch of roadworks represents 200 years of history and as you reach the bottom you can see the characteristic marks made by flint tools and deer antler pickaxes.
After seeing the roadworks the Germans were taken to the smoking remains of the Amazon fulfillment centre, scene of last months epic battle between juvenile Godzillas, part of Kim Jong Un’s plans for world domination and a marauding Orc army created by Swansea council for one purpose. Rather short-sighted as it turns out with Orc unemployment currently running at 100%.